The Quickest Way To Lose Trust

It was the final meeting with my potential new boss and I wanted to make sure I wasn’t signing on with someone I couldn’t work with. I asked how I would know if I did something wrong. He looked me straight in the eye and told me he would talk to me about this behind closed doors.

I liked his answer and accepted the offer to be part of an executive team.

A few months later though, I was at the office Christmas party at the home of one our colleagues. Standing by the table of food (where I liked to be), my boss approached me and launched into a rant about one of my chosen activities which supported new leaders and accused me of promoting certain actions which weren’t endorsed by our executive. This took me by surprise.

A few months later I watched this same leader take a project away from one of my colleagues and hand it to me during an executive team meeting. He accused my colleague of not making progress. I was horrified.

Then there was the executive team retreat where my boss went around the table, telling each one of us where we were...well...coming up short from his perspective. He told me I wasn’t strategic enough in front of the entire executive team — this was the first time I had ever been told this. I felt the air being sucked out of me and I wanted to hide.

So much for that conversation behind closed doors.

And so much for my trust in that leader.

The quickest way to have others lose trust in you is to break your promises and not follow through on commitments.

This won’t make you feel any better either.

So keep your promises and follow through on your commitments.

Pure and simple.

That to me is leadership in black and white.

Photo: Tammy Brimner/TLBVelo Photography