Unbalanced

It takes a lot of balance to race a bike

I woke up feeling completely unbalanced the other day. The days leading up to this moment were full of family and activities, and me being a part-time tour guide. All good things – until my battery became drained.

My Oura ring didn’t think I was unbalanced, with data showing both my readiness and sleep scores in the 80s. Those are very good scores – trust me.

Maybe I should just push through like I have often done before. I had thoughts like that.

Yet something new gnawed at me. Maybe it is because I have been paying more attention to what is happening inside me.

Then clarity knocked at my door.

My Oura ring can only assess my physical health, not my mental health.

(This makes me think about how AI can’t deal with the paranormal. Because it isn’t logical. I know this because I asked ChatGPT to summarize each chapter of an urban fantasy that my friend Nicola and I are writing to help bring us up to speed. It missed every paranormal activity and tried to explain it away.)

It is clear I need to check in on both my physical and mental health daily. Then act accordingly — as in, being intentional about all aspects of my well-being.

This doesn’t mean I give in to my emotions at that moment. If I am being intentional, then I can decide what needs more attention today. Maybe I need to focus more on mindfulness and my mental health. Maybe I really need to get some cardio in. Maybe I need to eat more fruits and vegetables.

I hope you can see where this is going.

But how did I know I was unbalanced?

I could feel it slowly building in my body over the days prior.

My body felt tight, and my brain felt foggy. My thoughts were a little on edge while my emotions were scattered all over the place.

All because of a schedule too full to fit in a meditation and some downtime.

Why?

Because I put the wellbeing of others before my own for a few days, consciously and intentionally.

I knew it would take some time to recover and re-balance. I also knew I would get what I needed soon. This wasn’t going to last forever.

But was my schedule really too full every day? Upon reflection, I would have to say that wasn’t true. There were pockets of downtime which could have been used to my advantage.

It has become abundantly clear over the past few months: I don’t make the best decisions when I am unbalanced. It is only in hindsight that I realize my folly. I am also living proof of how hard it is to stay in balance — and I don’t even have children or pets!

That is why I need to set up my environment in advance to help me make better decisions and strive to be balanced. I need to give myself a chance at least!

I call this my personal lifeboat.

A lifeboat filled with a whole bunch of knowledge about me and what I need to be at my best, along with the tools I can use to keep my lifeboat afloat. Because there will always be times when I think I am going to sink or be washed away.

I want everyone to have a lifeboat they can use whenever that happens.

Photo: Tammy Brimner/TLBVelo Photography